It didn’t seem possible that they’d be the kind to take part in the older prisoners’ shenanigans. Car theft, vandalism, car theft, possession with intent to supply, car theft, car theft, videogame piracy (plus car theft). The new arrivals were all fairly minor criminals. Honestly, you try to treat these people right but they just SPIT. An infirmary will be built with enough beds and doctors to treat multiple patients, in the unlikely event of another riot. A cleaning cupboard and a janitor will be instated, to clean up the filth left behind by everyone. The cells will be individual, for privacy’s sake (if Prison Architect can teach us anything about the justice system, it’s that man was not meant to poop side-by-side). His prize for not being a violent sociopath is the fashionable grey uniform of minimum security.Ī new cell block will be built to accommodate the six remaining prisoners, plus more new arrivals. Warren Scutt, a 41-year-old father of three who has served 10.5 of his 12 years for Death by Dangerous Driving. When my guards were finished whacking everybody round the bonce with cudgels I saw that only one prisoner had not attacked anyone or destroyed anything. Presumably a brawl began over some garlic bread – the most coveted of breads. Now two prisoners have been murdered, three are knocked out cold and two others are bloody and injured. I forgot to station a guard in the canteen during lunch hours and it turns out you can’t trust prisoners to finish their tea without incident. It is unlikely I’ll need those places straight away anyway. Other buildings – the infirmary, the morgue, cleaning cupboards, etc – will have to be finished some time after the initial batch of medium security inmates. All rounded off with a neat double-ring of fencing. A holding cell for new arrivals and extraneous scoundrels, a canteen, a yard, a shower (including drains), a kitchen, a visitor centre, some power stations and an office block for the admin staff. The first thing to do is to build all the basics. Welcome to Brendan’s Nice Prison For Agreeable People. CCTV, perimeter walls, sniffer dogs and guard patrols are sure to help make this a reality. In lieu of this, I wanted to see if it was possible to create a lovely, warm, sweet-smelling prison, just like ma used to make. I’ve run my fair share of ruinous hellholes but now that several updates have been added to give the player some more control over the disorder. And I don’t think building Cell Block B without any plumbing helps. If a full-scale riot isn’t the problem (rarely), then a lack of funds is. It's also incredibly difficult to manage.

Introversion’s deservedly popular Shawshank simulator is a lot of fun.

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